It’s the end of the day and you decide to scroll through Facebook, Snap Chat or whatever social media site you use the most, while you’re laying down resting. You scroll past the passive aggressive comments and stop at a post a “friend” posted at an exotic location with a loved one. Another post shows off an engagement ring, and another of someone announcing they got a promotion at work. You look at your life and feel less than them. You can’t help but feel a bit envious.
Comparing yourself to others is a sure way to lower your self worth. And that’s just not fair because you have no idea what’s behind the picture or status that’s posted on social media.
Yes there are people who vent about their problems for the world to see, but the majority of people always want to post only the good things.
People will post pictures of their “perfect” body but do not show themselves when they are sweaty or a mess during a work out.
Or posting about fun vacations but don’t say how hard it was to save for it, who really paid for it, or if they’re in more debt now.
Only looking at the end result and not the sacrifices, hard work or the journey of how they got there, does not give you an accurate picture of the truth.
The Social Comparison Theory states that we determine our own social and personal worth based on how we stack up against others. When you determine your self worth based on others, you’re guaranteed to not feel fulfilled.
Instead of comparing yourself to others, compare yourself to your previous self. What was your life like 6 months or a year ago? Five years ago? If you’re not happy with where you are, what is one action step you can take to get you closer to where you want to be?
Another way to feel less envious is to be happy for that person. They are a living example that the thing that you want can be achieved. If they could do it, so could you.
Try to focus less on others and more on yourself. So take what you see online with a grain of salt and bring your attention back to your life. Because you’re the only person you can do something about.
“LET PEOPLE DO WHAT
THEY NEED TO DO
TO MAKE THEM HAPPY.
MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS
& DO WHAT YOU NEED
TO DO TO MAKE
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About the author.
Liza J Alvarado is a professional counselor in private practice. She serves Adolescents, adults, and Spanish speaking families in the Lehigh Valley, PA area.